I got engaged recently and, like many engaged women, I've been looking at wedding dresses. Even before I got engaged, I knew I'd have a hard time finding a wedding dress. I'm not a huge fan of trains, but I don't think column dresses are so great for a wedding. I rarely like lace, I don't like wedding dress beading, and I am not a fan of shininess on dresses. I will not wear a dress that has bows or flowers on it. I want a long sleeved dress and I want it simple yet stylized. Clearly, I'm not an easy woman to shop for.
Why blog about my laments in regards to wedding dresses? Because I've been thinking about my style. I love my style. It is me and no one else. Sure, I wear things that other women would wear and I may even have some pieces of clothing that aren't particularly unique, but that's not what's important. What's important is what I tell people with my clothes, hair, make up, etc.
It's very important to me that I never look like a slob. I want to show people that I'm well put together and can think for myself. I don't ever want to look matronly but I refuse to show more than I deem appropriate (which isn't very much). I want people to look at me and know that I can get the job done. What job? I don't know, but I want people to think I do and that I can do it. I have anxiety about not dressing appropriately for occasions and I live by the rule that it's better to be over dressed than under dressed.
I think it's very important for everyone to care about their personal style. I don't think everyone needs to be a fashionista or even fashion forward. However, your clothes will say something about you whether you want them to or not. There are two serious style issues that I wish to address.
First, there are people who will never dress their age. I see this a lot in Utah and, as my friends can attest, it drives me nuts! One of the things that bugs me the most about living in Utah is the fashion of mothers and daughters. (Note: This is not every single family, and it's not only in Utah. There's just an unusually large population with this problem in Utah.) It's quite hard to tell the difference between many mothers, daughters, and, sometimes, grandmothers (shudder) from looking at clothes and hair in Utah. If the daughter dresses her age, the mother dresses the daughter's age as well. If the mother dresses her age, the daughter dresses the mother's age. I am a huge fan of age appropriate clothing.
When you are a teenager, you have a fundamental right to dress like a teenager. While it doesn't look very good, you can experiment with layering and wearing sweats with Uggs. Teenage years are a time for you to find your style. Experiment with clothes, figure out what looks good on you, what you like and what you don't like.
Mothers, middle-aged women, grandmothers, male equivelants of these labels, please let the teenagers be the teenagers. You can be stylish and still look like the mature person that you are. High fashion is there for you, if that's what you're interested in! There are plenty of clothing lines directed at you that are fashionable, fresh, beautiful, anything you're looking for in your clothing. You don't need to dress like a teenager to look young.
The other problem is people who refuse to admit that clothes define them. This is a delusional lie. Clothes will always say something about you. Clothes don't have to define you. Notice the title of my post. Style is your definition. Do you see the difference there? You have the control. When you decide that clothes don't matter and just throw on anything, people will see that you don't care. That's a horrible first impression. It's important to understand that style does not mean fashionable. If you, for some reason, are against fashion, then wear classics or something, but don't stop caring. That's a horrible practice. You don't have to be as obsessed with clothes and design as I am, but you should care about what you look like. Don't look like a hobo.
Now about wedding dresses, I want my style to show on my wedding. I may get lucky and find a dress that I love. However, I have planned for this and know how to make patterns. Dress designing, here I come!
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