How to be classy

I want to share something this week that has to do with fashion. I've had a hard time deciding what to share. I've decided to share a lesson I prepared for the girls back home about modesty a few years ago. The great thing about this lesson is it's designed in a way that it won't change with time. I want to share it in hopes that someone, some where, can get some ideas from it. This will be modified from the original lesson a little, but it's basically the same thing.

When I was a younger I was awkward (who isn't?) and I never thought boys would like me ever. When I got to high school boys were suddenly paying attention to me and I loved it. I soon realized that boys like cleavage. I was not lacking in this field and I figured there would be no harm in showing a little so I would wear increasingly lower cut shirts. I had heard the lessons in church about modesty but it was always something along the lines of "dress modestly because you're told to." I'm stubborn and a little rebellious (not much, but I tend to like to do the opposite of what I'm told when I'm not given a good reason. I once really wanted to get married just because my friend said I couldn't get married before her because her and her boyfriend had been dating longer and I thought that was a silly reason). It took a while before I realized there was a good reason I was told to dress modestly, and I wished someone had given me a better reason. I have come up with three reasons.

1. Dressing modestly shows you have respect for yourself. When you cover up you're telling people you don't need to be an object to feel good about yourself. You're confident in who you are in all ways, not just in your appearance. Girls that dress immodestly give off the impression that they feel they can only impress people with their bodies. In the business world it shows that you have little confidence in your abilities. While girls that show up to job interviews in short skirts and falling out of their shirts may get the job sometimes, in any respectable work places it wouldn't fly. You're taking away from your resume when dressing like that. It gives the message to your future employer that, no matter how impressive your resume is, you don't have the confidence in it to get you a job alone. 
2. Dressing modestly shows you have respect for others. Let's use the interview example again. When a girl goes in for a job interview with things hanging out and what not, it distracts the interviewer from the resume. If the interviewer is male, he may have a hard time looking at your face. I don't care what you may say about the interviewer, this is what happens. It doesn't matter if he's looking at your chest, legs, midriff, what ever is showing, or decidedly behind you or above you or down at what ever is in front of him. The fact still remains that he's not looking at your face. I don't know if many girls realize this, but revealing clothing can be distracting for female interviewers, as well. It may or may not be in the same way. Now put this in the every day world. Nearly every day you will see people. Most of these people don't want to see everything you have at once. Dressing immodestly is bound to make someone feel uncomfortable around you every day.
3. Dressing immodestly for a boy will not impress him and if it does he's not a boy you should be trying to impress. I think this is pretty simple and straight forward. Most women want to feel respected by men. If a guy is talking to you and dating you because he likes your (enter body part here), where is that relationship going to go? That's right, to the entered body part. If you're looking for a good, healthy relationship, impress a boy with your laugh, brain, wit, what have you. I'm not saying don't look good. Do look good. Looking good is important. But, as Michael Kors said at some point on Project Runway, you don't have to show everything to have sex appeal. 

Another bit in this lesson I gave had to do with shopping. I'm going to shorten this section considerably because it's hard to type. I had girls pick things that went together to make a point.

It is possible to make almost anything modest by layering. Always have good white and black camisoles. The best way to layer is by following this check list in the order I will present it:

1. Color If your reds are a little off and right next to each other someone will notice. If your colors clash horribly everyone will notice. This is the first thing people will see
2. Style The next thing people see is style. You don't have to be close to someone to see that they mixed styles that compliment each other or didn't. I can spot style clashes from 50 feet easy and I can't be the only one.
3. Fabric Not many people can tell exactly what type of fabric you're wearing until they're within talking distance. It's important to match fabrics, this will just be the last thing people see. 

Now, don't go crazy layering. The less you wear t-shirts under tank tops the better. Layering doesn't always have to be like that, either. It's perfectly acceptable to wear a nice blazer over a more revealing blouse to make it less revealing. If you really want to wear t-shirts under things, make sure your neck lines compliment each other. A good example is a crew neck with a halter top. That looks tacky. I actually think most halters look tacky anyway, but that looks especially tacky. If you're not like me and do like halters, scoop or v necks look the best with them. 

When you go shopping, go shopping with someone, preferably someone that is blunt. Ask them if something looks tacky if you can't decide. It's also nice to have someone there to tell you if your butt crack is showing when you sit down. Always make sure you sit down when trying on pants, shorts, skirts, and dresses. Decide how long you want your skirts and make sure they're still that long when you sit. Bend over, move around, make sure your clothes actually fit and won't fall off. 

And finally a word of advice: Get classic clothes. A pair of nice jeans will never go out of style. Fads can be nice but they won't last. But never give up! I entered the mature clothing stage in the early millennium when all the shirts were short and the pants were low and butt crack was the new cleavage. Bermuda shorts didn't exist, knee length skirts were rare, knee length dresses even rarer. When there is a slump in good clothes, just wait it out. Buy classic clothes while you can and they can last you until you feel comfortable with the styles again.